Please See Me

The truth is, we're not just distracted drivers, we're distracted people.

A while back, I developed a funny habit while driving. If you look into other people's cars (I don't recommend) you'll probably notice that 95% of the people driving are distracted. Most people are looking at their phones, but having grown up in Chicago, my sister and I have seen it all.

We saw drivers texting, reading (books, yes), eating a bowl of oatmeal, doing their makeup, talking on the phone, reviewing papers, watching a show... It's a wonder we get anywhere safe at all.

When I'm driving and I see a car turning onto the road, backing out of the driveway, or pulling up behind me, I catch myself saying aloud "Please see me."

I know they can't hear me, it's just my body's reaction to hoping that they do (and see me). Aren't most of us saying this though?

Our hearts are whispering or screaming to be seen in so many areas of life. We want to be heard, we want to be understood, but maybe more than anything we want to be seen. Not looked at-- Looking doesn't cause a reaction, seeing does.

Our boss at work looks at us, but does he or she see us? Does he see the work I am doing or my potential? Are our friends or spouses looking at us, or are they seeing us? Do they see when something's wrong or when we need help?

Children want to be seen by their parents, and babies need to be. Before a child can communicate his or her needs, they are at the mercy of their parents seeing them and noticing when they're tired, hungry, or sick.

I was a quiet kid, but my mom could always tell when something was wrong, or if I didn't feel well. "It's all over your face," she would say. She saw me.

Feeling seen is tied to feeling known, and we all want to feel known. When you feel known, you feel seen, heard, and loved, but when someone disregards one of those things, my oh my does it hurt. The truth is, we're not just distracted drivers, we're distracted people.

Phones draw us into them with useless social media updates (thanks for reading this by the way), news, videos, and the internet, but even before phones consumed our lives, we've always been distracted by jobs (the ones that don't truly end at 5 o'clock), finances, homework, appointments, hobbies, obligations, and that never-ending to-do list that somehow still grows even when you mark stuff off.

Sometimes, it feels like we can see the wheels spinning 500 mph in the mind of the person who we're trying to share a meal with. You know when someone's there, but they're not really "there." They're looking at you, but if you ask them to tell you what you talked about 24 hours later, they probably couldn't tell you.

My grandpa would've been 93 in a couple of weeks, but talk about an interesting man who was never distracted (while I was alive at least). He lived 89 years, with no cellphone, no internet, nor a phone that didn't come with a chord attached.

When I talked to him on the phone, I knew he was sitting in his chair not doing anything else but listening to me. When my sister and I practiced our instruments, he just listened. No phone, no bills, no papers, just sitting and listening. And when we went to brunch, we just sat, ate, and talked. He didn't have anything to distract him the entire hour while he slowly ate his toast and gave me his undivided attention. He saw us.

I think it's interesting how such a simple generation grew up in such complicated times.

Do you feel seen? Do you feel seen by your parents, spouse, friends, colleagues, church, or community? Maybe you're in a season where you do feel seen and there's no feeling like it. Or maybe you're in a season where it feels like you could disappear for a while and no one would notice.

Take heart friend, for I can guarantee that there is at least someone on earth who sees you (or wants to). But even if there truly was no one, are still seen, friend. There is nothing that happens to you that goes unnoticed. Your Heavenly Father who created you could never forget you.

"Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!" (Isaiah 49:15)

There is nowhere you could go that God would not see you. Hagar was used and then left out to dry. As she fled to the desert, pregnant and scared, she believed she was all alone, but God proved to her otherwise.

When an angel came to her to deliver her the news about her unborn son, she said "You are the God who sees me, for she said, "I have now seen the One who sees me." (Genesis 16:13) God didn't just physically see her, He saw her in a way that showed her she was known.

He is the God who made you, loves you, hears you, and sees you.